The Big Book of Lies

It's not big and it's not a book

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    Impress your friends and startle your enemies with a never-ending* series of incredible facts, figures and news reports, all of which are COMPLETELY UNTRUE! Why waste time on the truth when complete rubbish is so much more interesting?

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  • Credit where Credit is Due

    With thanks and credit to Monty Python and The Hackenthorpe Book of Lies (p.74, The Brand New Monty Python Bok), which amused me immensely as a teenager and eventually helped inspire the site you are reading now. Not an ENTIRELY wasted youth then.

Posts Tagged ‘Venus’

Facebook Wants Your Babies!

Posted by Arthur St John Bodysnatcher on January 14, 2010

Satan Loves Facebook

Satan - the CEO of Facebook

Facebook fans should sign up to our new group, helping prevent the site from enacting it’s new sinister plans.

Starting this summer, Facebook – headed by Satan – will start charging people $100 a day JUST FOR OWNING A COMPUTER! They will also be demanding the sacrifice all all first born children to their God Cthulhu and be setting up death camps for all Myspace, Bebo and Twitter users.

The Big Book of Bad Wisdom has exclusive information that Facebook is in fact run by Satan, who is working in collaboration with Venusian invaders determined to enslave humanity. However, if a mere one billion people join this group, the slimy invaders will rethink their plans, and Satan will relinquish his hold on your soul – and, more importantly, not charge you to throw virtual sheep at people.

Sign up here

Posted in Art and Culture, Folklore & Superstition, Technology, World Events | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

The Royal Family are Aliens

Posted by Arthur St John Bodysnatcher on December 3, 2009

Ming the Merciless

Ming the Merciless is seventh in line for the British throne

Britain’s Royal Family are descended from aliens.

Queen Elizabeth II, her ill-informed, gobby son and the rest of the royal pack – both legitimate and otherwise – can trace their lineage back to invading Venusians in 1765. The aliens landed in Britain and kidnapped George III, forcing him to procreate with the Venusian Queen. The couple eventually fell in love, and moved back to Earth, where her offspring eventually inherited the British throne.

The British-Venusian Royal connection was severed when the reigning Vensuian Queen Minginella converted to Catholicism in 1843. In more recent years, however, the Venusians have reverted back to their original faith and so are now a full part of the royal lineage again.

Posted in History, Politics, Religion | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »